Something that is missing.

Have you ever gone through a rut, where you feel like something is missing? Whether is spiritual, physical, emotional?

I'm in a rut. I've been in this rut for a really long time.

I've talked about my anxiety and depression issues, but I think this is bigger than that. I really think that I'm missing something. I'm determined to find what that is.

Step one: Find a singles ward.  My mom will be so proud.  I haven't been to church church since I was 18.  I was a pretty reluctant child growing up.  I always wanted to do things my way, and make adult choices even though I was 14.  Now that I'm an actual adult, I wish I wasn't so reluctant back then.  So, I'm making a choice to go back into the world of religion to maybe have a different perspective and to really see if it is for me, or isn't.

Step two: Lifestyle change.  I'm pretty unhealthy.  I eat like complete crap, and maybe exercise once a week.. maybe.  That will need to change.  I know that changing my diet to mostly fruits and vegetables will help so many aspects of my life.  My anxiety attacks will show up less, my energy levels will go up, and I will overall just feel good.

Step three: Communicate.  I'm not good at communication.  I don't like to stir up an argument or make someone feel mad or sad. So, I'm usually keeping my mouth shut.  So, I'll be working on speaking up and saying what I need to say. If someone doesn't like it, then that's just too damn bad.

Step four: Make decisions for me, not for anyone else.  I don't want to not do something just because I think someone will look at me differently, or judge me, or whatever they may think.  All that matters is that I'm happy with it, right? right.

Here's to my mid-twenties crisis. Woop Woop.